Gone: Peace and the Lake – Ch. 6

The birds sang in the distance as the wind jostled my hair over my shoulders. I closed my eyes listening to the leaves collide into each other.

I could hear the water splash against the shoreline. I moved into my quaint home two years ago. From the moment I stepped foot in this little town, I fell in love with the lake. I was just two blocks from the water.

Sometimes I would come, sit and enjoy the morning stillness. Other days I would run alongside of it, if the sidewalks allowed. There is just something about the water that transforms me.

Today was no different. Just over an hour ago I dragged myself from my bed. I slept for nearly 14 hours and my body was screaming at me to eat. I walked to the local coffee shop, snagged a sandwich, and a black coffee, and made my way to my favorite dock.

It was tucked away between some trees and was never occupied. So, I made it my safe haven – my place for peace.

The sun was warm on my face as it began to set. I leaned my head back and took in a deep breath. Boats roared past me as I brought my gaze back up. I had always wanted a boat, but I never could purchase one. “One day,” I thought.

I sipped my coffee. I could almost feel its warmth trace my veins. I had eaten part of the turkey croissant that I ordered. It was one of my favorites, but I just didn’t have the stomach for it today.

It was almost 8 p.m., and boats were coming in one by one. Some were filled with families. Some with children donning bright colored life vests. Others filled with groups of friends, who may or may not have had too much fun on the lake that day.

I put myself on those boats sometimes. Imagining myself in another life. Today was not one of them. I just watched, listened, as they laughed and sped past. The laughter always carried over the trees.

What would my life look like moving forward? My friends were all married, with multiple children. They had their own families to take care of, which often drove a wedge between friendships. Too many things needed their attention I guess, I was at the bottom of their list.

At that moment, I closed my eyes and prayed. “Dear God, I believe in you. I trust in you. Please take this life and make it what you wish.”

The wind picked up for a brief moment. I took that as a sign that he heard me. I smiled for the first time in weeks…hell months. I stood up, picked up the remnants of my sandwich and coffee and walked toward the wooden stairs.

At that moment, I decided that it was time to reclaim my life. The lake did that to me. Allowed me to find strength – even if ever so brief.

Next Chapter: Gone: To Be Clear